Progressing well

I am approaching the three month mark since surgery and I finally feel I can see an end to the "recovery process".

I have much greater movement in my legs and can kneel now for a short time. My legs don't have as much pain, and usually only when I have had a big day. The right leg is worse than the left, and some days the left leg doesn't give me any trouble.

The swelling is the hardest thing to cope with still. My legs are still quite swollen. Some days I think I notice a big change, but then the next I get discouraged again. But they are definitely getting smaller! - slowly!!! I still have some swelling around my middle. That swelling goes up and down depending on the time of day and what sort of activity I have done during the day.

I am able to exercise daily, but to no where near the intensity that I am used to. But any exercise is better than none and while my heart doesn't get to pump as fast as it can, my legs are managing to tone up under all the swelling.

My arms are usually ok, I get some sore spots, but I can reach up without as much pain. I get a funny sensation around my elbows which is possibly the nerves repairing themselves.

I am often asked am I glad I had the surgery. I can now say, I am glad, but I wish I had a better idea of the recovery process. I suppose the surgeon and the nurses can only go by a general level of information as everyone is different. But I feel I wasn't warned enough about the length of time for recovery. (Or maybe I chose not to retain that part of the information given!!!)

I certainly love the range of clothes I can now wear, and shopping is so much more fun and less embarrassing. I like feeling like I am in the "normal" size range and if anyone looks twice at me on the street, I know it is not to get a second look at the really big woman!!

Andrew and I had the most fantastic weekend staying at The Windsor. We really treated ourselves and enjoyed every minute of our time. And it was so exciting to fit into the bath robe supplied!!!!

Fitting into my skin!!

Today I have had a day where I have been confident with how I look. Also a day that I feel like my body and the swelling haven't let me down. Some days I get really frustrated with the swelling and feel really discouraged that all this pain and discomfort has been a waste of time. But today as I have said in the title, I feel I had a day of fitting into my skin!!! Funny thing to say, but it describes how it feels to have such a different body to what I am used to.

To mark this day, I took the above photos. I purposely didn't take my face, but the parts of my body that have given me a real boost today.

In regards to healing, it still continues to be a slow process. I am happy though that the infected spots are all healing quite quickly. I only have one small spot on my right leg now. The pain and stiffness in my legs is slowly going and I can have moments of not even feeling any discomfort in them. The end of the day is a different story, but that is to be expected. The swelling is taking the longest to heal, but I have been doing a bit of reading, and see that this length of time is quite normal. Changing position, whether while in bed or getting out of a chair or in and out of the car is what gives me the most trouble. But that is getting less now, and as long as I don't stay in the same position for too long, I am ok.

So, it is the time to keep positive, and hang onto the confidence I feel today. And then to remember to use these great feelings to pick me up the next time I am feeling down and unsure of the whole process.

Six Weeks Post Surgery and Back to Work!!

I have had my first week back at work, and let me tell you, I am glad it is the weekend!!!

I was tired every day by 3pm but I managed. I was able to think clearly enough to get paperwork done and I had enough energy to visit clients. So I am pleased with that. Of course my diary filled up quickly but keeping busy is good also. It was great to think that in the 6th week post surgery I was able to handle being back at work again. And it was no where near as difficult or emotional as returning after my first surgery.

I have also enjoyed wearing some new clothes!!!

The swelling is still slowly going down on my legs and my infected spots are improving. I still seem to have an increase of swelling around my middle by the end of the day, which mostly goes down by the morning. I had another little spot open up on my right leg, but nothing too serious. I am finding that the spots that open up and ooze have a tiny stitch in them. The stitch eventually comes out after a couple of days - or if I pull hard enough on it - but that hurts. The stitches are just under the surface of the skin. Hopefully there aren't too many more.

I have tried to start a bit of exercise as I was feeling too sluggish with not doing anything structured. I have made sure I keep as active as possible, but I have been missing that feeling of having a good walk or a session of aerobics. I have had a couple of easy walks, one for 30 minutes and one today for 50 minutes with a few hills. I also tried a very easy, gentle 30 minute walk aerobics. I can tell you I felt every single step!! My legs hurt with each step, but not so badly that I had to stop. Generally I now have a feeling of a tight band around my knee and thigh area rather than pain. I get a stinging feeling where I have infected spots, but that settles after a while.

As for my arms, the scars have healed really well now and even starting to fade a bit. I still get a few twinges of pain around the elbow area, and reaching high is still a bit painful, but otherwise my arms are doing really well. I still have a little spot along the bra line scar that is open, but in the past few days it has gotten a lot smaller and doesn't ooze anymore.

Some days I still get very frustrated and low about how I feel and how long it seems to be taking to feel ok again, but last Thursday when I realised it was 6 weeks since surgery, I thought to myself that for 6 weeks post surgery, I am not doing too badly. I am such an impatient person!!!

I am starting to enjoy my body and my new shape. Andrew is so great encouraging me and telling me how great I look. I am enjoying the way I look in some of my new clothes. I am totally different to how I have been my whole life. I still catch myself in mirrors when I am out and can't believe it is me staring back at me! If I am having a confident day, I sneak a look at myself in anything that gives a reflection!!!!

Recovery progress continues.............

I am so pleased to be able to report that I am feeling so much better. I have much less pain and I only have one infected spot left. My movement is getting easier and I'm not as stiff when I change position. I am even able to manage a bit of shopping now!!!

I saw my surgeon the other day and I wasn't entirely thrilled with that visit. He advised me that the swelling would take another 3 months to go down. My thighs are still quite swollen, the right is worse than the left. He didn't seem to be able to give me any other information about the recovery and the expected results as he also has to wait for the swelling to go down. He has told me there may be small areas where the skin is a bit puckered that may need a bit of work. AAARRGGHHH, I don't know if I can stand anymore procedures!! Anyway, I don't have to see him again for another 3 months.

I am going back to work on Monday. I will go straight back into full time work, but my manager has been great saying I can take Wednesday off if I am getting too tired. I am ready to go back to work, I'm getting tired of being in the house all the time. I have started going out a lot though for a few hours at a time. I get a bit tired but its manageable.

Along with all the physiological changes to get used to, there are a lot of emotional and psychological things to work through. I see every little imperfection on my body and sometimes blow it right out of proportion. Its not that I want a perfect body, because what is a perfect body anyway! I just want to feel like I have a normal body, and a body that I am happy with and can be proud of the work I have done. When I see the swelling around my middle or on my legs, I don't always think clearly and rather than see it as swelling I see it as me getting bigger. Andrew is great at getting me back to reality and he is so supportive and encouraging. His words are often enough to fix my thoughts, but this thinking is part of the process also. I have been a certain size for all my life, and I have only had this new body for a short time. The way I perceive myself has a great impact on my confidence and belief in what I have achieved. Sometimes it is daunting when I think about my whole lifestyle change and that it has to be for life. I can't just relax now and think that is all I have to do! I am looking forward to being able to get back into my routine of exercise and the eating plan I have when I am at work and then the weekends. I feel safe when I have that routine. That is the routine that works for me!!

As I have gotten better over the past few weeks, my favourite thing to do is to look through my cook books and try recipes I have always wanted to make. I love cooking, and find it very relaxing and therapeutic. The challenge is to find good, healthy things to bake and cook, or to adapt the favourites so that they can be enjoyed without too much guilt!

Well, I hope to continue with the positive steps of recovery that I have been having. Next hurdle is getting back into work!!

These are the balloons my sister organised to be delivered to me!!

Three weeks after surgery...........

This time last week I was in agony!! I was feeling so sorry for myself and had the old feelings of what on earth have I done to myself and why on earth did I do it!! The day I am talking about is the day after having the staples and stitches taken out of my legs and arms. Having them taken out was an extremely painful and traumatic experience. It was so unpleasant and the nurse was being so careful and taking good care of me while doing it. She did it slowly and in stages, swapping areas to give each part of my body a rest. I can tell you I did lots of slow deep breathing and sipping water!! I was hoping for a sense of relief once they were all out, but what I got was a few days of trying to recover from the ordeal. The couple of infection spots made it a more painful experience also. I didn't think I could make it through it all and even almost asked for my mum to be brought in to hold my hand!!! I felt I had gone backwards in my recovery and couldn't help but cry into my mum's arms feeling so distraught. I was now having more trouble walking and I couldn't get comfortable in any position.

But, one week on, I am happy to report that I am starting to feel improvements in my legs and arms. The swelling is slowly going down on my legs and I can see the shape of my knee again and the dreaded veins that pop out!!! I can walk a lot easier and with much less discomfort now. My upper thighs are the worst affected and still get in the way of each other!!! I am able to stand without my legs feeling like they are heavy tree trunks and my legs bend a lot easier at the knee. My arms still have a few tender spots and some quite red areas. The infected spots on my legs and arms are healing very well now and don't ooze anymore. I have a morning routine of sitting on the bed (in a very unladylike position) and using the hair dryer to dry my legs and arms. This was recommended by my mum who we affectionately call "Matron". (She was a nurse many years ago). I then put betadine on the bits that need it and wait for everything to dry again. I think this has really helped. The bruising all over my body is fading and only a few spots still look like I have been bashed about.

Its amazing what a week can do for you. I am hoping that this time next week I will be almost back to normal.

Just to finish this note, I thought a pleasant photo of Thomas was needed!!! He makes me smile everyday!!!

Recovery Time Again!!

Well, it is Day 14 since my surgery and it has been tough going!!

Having an inner thigh reduction has been painful!! My legs are very swollen and bruised and I have a long suture line of staples from my groin down to my calf! My legs feel like tree trunks and walking has been an interesting experience!! Not to mention sitting!!

I am wearing a body suit that makes going to the toilet a complete production. I am sure a man designed it.

My arms have been done and they are getting better at a quicker rate than my legs. The first couple of days I could hardly move them, but that is much easier now. I can't reach up very well, but at least I can wash my hair now.

I had to go the first week without a shower. I found this very difficult. I hate not showering daily and with the body suit, the oozing and the difficulties when on the toilet made me feel very miserable. I had a complete change of mood, motivation and thinking once I had my first shower.

Anyway, taking a step back to surgery day, I was drawn on extensively by the surgeon. I couldn't believe the amount of work he was going to be doing and I suddenly got quite nervous and fearful of how I would cope. Surgery went for a lot longer than anticipated. I was in surgery for 8 hours. But I didn't have any complications like last time, and my blood pressure stayed as it should. I have had another 8kg of skin removed, along with whatever came off with the parts that I had liposuction.

Running faster!

I just wanted to record an achievement that I am a bit proud of!!

There is a track not far from my home that I run around. Before surgery last year, I could run it in about 7 - 8 minutes. About two weeks ago, I ran it in 4 minutes!!! I couldn't believe it. Then, a couple of days ago, I ran it in 3 minutes 48 seconds!!! I felt I like I was running faster than I used to, but that sort of improvement really surprised and thrilled me!!!

My goal was always to be fit again ready for the second surgery. With it being booked a lot sooner than first thought, I was worried I wasn't putting myself in the best possible position for a good recovery, but after taking note of this running achievement, I think I am fitter than what I was thinking!! I still have a constant feeling that I am wearing a belt that is a bit tight, but it doesn't bother me as much and some days I hardly notice it.

I am feeling positive again!