Three weeks after surgery...........

This time last week I was in agony!! I was feeling so sorry for myself and had the old feelings of what on earth have I done to myself and why on earth did I do it!! The day I am talking about is the day after having the staples and stitches taken out of my legs and arms. Having them taken out was an extremely painful and traumatic experience. It was so unpleasant and the nurse was being so careful and taking good care of me while doing it. She did it slowly and in stages, swapping areas to give each part of my body a rest. I can tell you I did lots of slow deep breathing and sipping water!! I was hoping for a sense of relief once they were all out, but what I got was a few days of trying to recover from the ordeal. The couple of infection spots made it a more painful experience also. I didn't think I could make it through it all and even almost asked for my mum to be brought in to hold my hand!!! I felt I had gone backwards in my recovery and couldn't help but cry into my mum's arms feeling so distraught. I was now having more trouble walking and I couldn't get comfortable in any position.

But, one week on, I am happy to report that I am starting to feel improvements in my legs and arms. The swelling is slowly going down on my legs and I can see the shape of my knee again and the dreaded veins that pop out!!! I can walk a lot easier and with much less discomfort now. My upper thighs are the worst affected and still get in the way of each other!!! I am able to stand without my legs feeling like they are heavy tree trunks and my legs bend a lot easier at the knee. My arms still have a few tender spots and some quite red areas. The infected spots on my legs and arms are healing very well now and don't ooze anymore. I have a morning routine of sitting on the bed (in a very unladylike position) and using the hair dryer to dry my legs and arms. This was recommended by my mum who we affectionately call "Matron". (She was a nurse many years ago). I then put betadine on the bits that need it and wait for everything to dry again. I think this has really helped. The bruising all over my body is fading and only a few spots still look like I have been bashed about.

Its amazing what a week can do for you. I am hoping that this time next week I will be almost back to normal.

Just to finish this note, I thought a pleasant photo of Thomas was needed!!! He makes me smile everyday!!!

Recovery Time Again!!

Well, it is Day 14 since my surgery and it has been tough going!!

Having an inner thigh reduction has been painful!! My legs are very swollen and bruised and I have a long suture line of staples from my groin down to my calf! My legs feel like tree trunks and walking has been an interesting experience!! Not to mention sitting!!

I am wearing a body suit that makes going to the toilet a complete production. I am sure a man designed it.

My arms have been done and they are getting better at a quicker rate than my legs. The first couple of days I could hardly move them, but that is much easier now. I can't reach up very well, but at least I can wash my hair now.

I had to go the first week without a shower. I found this very difficult. I hate not showering daily and with the body suit, the oozing and the difficulties when on the toilet made me feel very miserable. I had a complete change of mood, motivation and thinking once I had my first shower.

Anyway, taking a step back to surgery day, I was drawn on extensively by the surgeon. I couldn't believe the amount of work he was going to be doing and I suddenly got quite nervous and fearful of how I would cope. Surgery went for a lot longer than anticipated. I was in surgery for 8 hours. But I didn't have any complications like last time, and my blood pressure stayed as it should. I have had another 8kg of skin removed, along with whatever came off with the parts that I had liposuction.

Running faster!

I just wanted to record an achievement that I am a bit proud of!!

There is a track not far from my home that I run around. Before surgery last year, I could run it in about 7 - 8 minutes. About two weeks ago, I ran it in 4 minutes!!! I couldn't believe it. Then, a couple of days ago, I ran it in 3 minutes 48 seconds!!! I felt I like I was running faster than I used to, but that sort of improvement really surprised and thrilled me!!!

My goal was always to be fit again ready for the second surgery. With it being booked a lot sooner than first thought, I was worried I wasn't putting myself in the best possible position for a good recovery, but after taking note of this running achievement, I think I am fitter than what I was thinking!! I still have a constant feeling that I am wearing a belt that is a bit tight, but it doesn't bother me as much and some days I hardly notice it.

I am feeling positive again!

Is that my shadow???

I decided to have a walk this morning instead of a run. It was a glorious morning and the sun was shining. During a part of the walk the sun was over my shoulder, providing me with a full length shadow just in front of me. It took me a while to realise it was my shadow. I just couldn't believe that it was a reflection of my body. I suddenly realised that I have been getting too discouraged about the parts of my body that aren't quite right yet instead of being encouraged by the parts that are looking quite good and show my hard work. I'm not looking to be a "super model" or anything, but to have a body that reflects all the work I have put in to it and that it shows my fittness. Even with this upcoming surgery I know I won't be perfect, but what is perfect anyway?? I am still getting used to having a body this size. It is totally new to me. So the journey continues................

While I was out walking, a lady who was working in her garden asked me "is it all worth it?" Without hesitation I said "It sure is". I was thinking that not only is the exercise good for strengthening my heart, lungs, muscles and my general health and fitness, but it lifts my mood and confidence in myself. It is a great way to keep the mental health in good shape also! So how could it not be worth it!!!!

Next Surgery Date Set!!!

WOW, I can't believe that after such a long wait last year for my first surgery, the second one is happening in under 2 weeks!!!! Hardly enough time to work out how many sleeps to go!!

I had decided on booking the surgery in May, but then there were no spots free in May anymore and the next available was July!!! OOOOHHHH I couldn't wait that long. Then I was told that there was a spot on the 27th March! The initial problem with this date was it is on a Thursday, and as the private hospital I go to closes at lunch time on Saturdays, I would only have 2 nights in hospital, and the surgeon would have liked 3 at least. So, after discussions between the surgeon and the nursing staff, he said if I was happy to take the chance that 2 nights would be enough, then he would do the surgery on the 27th March!!! So, with a lot of emotion, I took the the 27th March!! When I got off the phone from booking it, I just burst into tears.

That fits in perfectly with my leave that was already planned, and Andrew will also be on leave. The one little glitch is that my parents leave to visit my sister in New Zealand on the 31st March!! So, no mum helping out when I am home from hospital, and of course, no sister! But with Andrew on leave, that helps. And now my dear friend Nat who is a Nurse is going to stay a couple of days to help Andrew out! So, I feel more than confident that I will be well cared for!! Mum will stay a few days when they get home from New Zealand.

I have many feelings about this second surgery. I get quite spooked when I think about waking up from the anaesthetic and how yukky that feels. I can't wait to be rid of the extra skin still flopping around, especially on my legs, but I'm not looking forward to the slow process of recovery. Well it is all going to be another adventure, but at least I don't have so much of the unknown this time. The surgeon keeps promising me it won't be nearly as major as the first one and I won't feel as bad. Oh I hope not!

I am really starting to feel a lot better. I still have a dressing on over the hole, but it is much smaller and doesn't ooze nearly as much. I have been doing a bit of jogging and not suffering as much afterwards. I can now go a few hours without even noticing that I have had surgery around my middle. Psychologically I have improved heaps, just hearing from the surgeon how well my recovery has been going and that I am ready for the next surgery. Looking in the mirror isn't as hard now, knowing it will all change again in a couple of weeks.

Thanks again for all your support.

Back to the GP and the Surgeon!

I went back to my GP about my "hole". He was a little concerned that it had gotten deeper, so he decided to send me for blood tests to make sure there wasn't a deep infection and also checked to make sure I hadn't developed diabetes, this being another explanation for taking so long to heal. He also suggested that I consider an ultra sound on the area to ensure there is no fluid build up. He also suggested I see my surgeon sooner rather than later.

I saw the surgeon on Friday afternoon, and in his typical fashion, wasn't too concerned about the hole but did acknowledge that 4 1/2 months was a long time to still have this trouble. He advised I stop packing the hole with gauze and he felt it would heal up ok. If it didn't heal very soon, or if it broke down again, he would have me in the hospital for a day procedure where he cut that section open, fixed whatever was causing the problem, and sew it all back up again. He said it could just be a dead fat cell that hadn't dissolved, or something like that!!!

But besides the hole, he was very pleased with how my skin had toned up where it should, and loosened where it should. He is now keen to complete the work. He didn't think it was important to wait until the hole heals or wait any extended time. Unfortunately he is booked when I have my annual leave planned in April, and as I don't have sick leave due now until October, I can't just book surgery until I sort out my leave from work. He is available in May, so after a preliminary discussion with my manager to determine if I could change my leave, I now have a few decisions to make!! The surgeon promises me that the second surgery will be no where near as difficult or major as the first. The tidy up he has to do on my stomach is very minimal recovery, my arms will be about a 10 day recover, but my legs will be the major thing to recover from.

I will receive his surgery quote in the mail this week, so once I have that, and have decided what I really want to do, and made sure I wasn't going to upset too many people by changing my leave, I will know what the near future holds. Of course I was really looking forward to having 3 weeks holiday and Andrew and I were planning on going away. I have been so busy at work and have had some very stressful situations to deal with, so time off that wasn't spent getting over surgery was looking very attractive. My manager suggested I take a week off with Easter so that I have a bit of a break and I don't use up too much of my annual leave. So that was really thoughtful of her.

The latest news of Andrew's shoulder is his physio was concerned about one particular movement that Andrew still couldn't do. He was worried that the bones were causing the problem rather than a muscular thing. The phsyio talked to Andrew's surgeon, who then instructed X -Rays be taken and said Andrew needed to see him in the next 2 weeks. There has been some talk that Andrew may need surgery to adjust the pins. Andrew isn't keen on more surgery, but I am encouraging him to just wait to see what the surgeon says.

So that is the news of the two invalids!!! What a pair we are hey!! I suppose it helps us to both understand the frustrations of surgery and its recovery.

Needed jeans already!!!

I had been holding off buying jeans until my open wound was all healed and the swelling had gone down. But with the cooler weather we have been having I couldn't wait any longer!! It was hard finding jeans that fit well all over, as quite often with pants, I find to get a waist that fits well, the leg is too small. Boy it will be good to have the skin taken from my legs!!!

Anyway, I managed to find a pair that weren't too expensive, and I am quite happy with them. I also gained a few nice comments about my butt in them too!!!! (Always like to hear that!!)

Well I am still having trouble with an open wound that is referred to now as my "hole". The GP took a swab that came back all clear, so that is good, no bacteria. But he decided that for it to heal properly from the inside out, it needed to be filled with packing gauze!!! He told me it could take up to 4 weeks to heal properly. I am in week 3 now and I am fed up!! I have another appointment to see him next week. The cavity has changed somewhat. It has had some improvement but the hole is quite deep and I am still able to fill it with quite a length of the ribbon gauze. I can't contain the ooze in the waterproof dressing that I put over the top of it. I get a terrible rash from the dressing, but the pharmacist helped out with that one and suggested a skin prep wipe that I put on my skin which then acts as a barrier, so my poor skin doesn't get ripped off every time I have to change the dressing. My skin even started bleeding for a while. The rash is much improved now though.

I still get very frustrated with the amount of swelling I get at the end of the day. It's not so bad if I am just going to bed, but when I am going out and want to wear closer fitting tops, I feel too self conscious about the swelling showing. Plus I still have some loose skin that needs to be taken care of with the next surgery.

I am trying to have some days of more intense exercise as I miss the jogging. I miss the feeling it gives me and how I feel after a good sweat!! But I can't do it too often as I still suffer for a few days afterwards of increased discomfort around the scar line and stiffness when bending or twisting. And of course it doesn't help the hole!!! It can get quite sore if I have been too active.

But, I am still surviving, and some days I feel quite good and hardly notice that I have had surgery.

Thanks to all of you who read my blog and give me such wonderful support and feedback. I suppose we all have to "hang in there" with some aspect of our lives!!!