Me before my journey began.
June 2004
Tuesday 3 March 2009
Ages since I wrote!!
Sunday 19 October 2008
Finally an update!
Sunday 20 July 2008
Sick of the swelling!!!
It is over three months now since my last surgery and I am still experiencing swelling. The surgeon did tell me to expect swelling until at least August, but as the weeks progress, I hope for a faster loss of the swelling. My legs are slowly returning to a normal shape, but still have a way to go. Around my middle is what really annoys me. The swelling goes up and down. Some days I feel like I have a beach ball under my skin, and other days its hardly noticeable. I have tried to work out what causes more swelling, but haven't found anything conclusive.
I know that if I have a day in the office for work, rather than being out on the road visiting clients, I have more swelling at the end of the day. Exercise and resting seem to have varying affects on the swelling. I get very frustrated with the swelling and have days of feeling very down about the way I look. I still struggle with accepting the way I look is because of the swelling. Body image is such a huge thing. It is hard getting used to such a different body and discovering what is "normal" for me. I still don't know how my body is going to end up like.
I am exercising a minimum of 1 hour a day and trying to tone up underneath the swelling!!! I am able to run again and am really pleased to be running up to 5km again. I still feel every step in terms of where I have had surgery, but I can ignore it now!! I love the feeling after a run. It's great to make my body work hard!!!
Tuesday 3 June 2008
Progressing well
Tuesday 20 May 2008
Fitting into my skin!!
Today I have had a day where I have been confident with how I look. Also a day that I feel like my body and the swelling haven't let me down. Some days I get really frustrated with the swelling and feel really discouraged that all this pain and discomfort has been a waste of time. But today as I have said in the title, I feel I had a day of fitting into my skin!!! Funny thing to say, but it describes how it feels to have such a different body to what I am used to.
To mark this day, I took the above photos. I purposely didn't take my face, but the parts of my body that have given me a real boost today.
In regards to healing, it still continues to be a slow process. I am happy though that the infected spots are all healing quite quickly. I only have one small spot on my right leg now. The pain and stiffness in my legs is slowly going and I can have moments of not even feeling any discomfort in them. The end of the day is a different story, but that is to be expected. The swelling is taking the longest to heal, but I have been doing a bit of reading, and see that this length of time is quite normal. Changing position, whether while in bed or getting out of a chair or in and out of the car is what gives me the most trouble. But that is getting less now, and as long as I don't stay in the same position for too long, I am ok.
So, it is the time to keep positive, and hang onto the confidence I feel today. And then to remember to use these great feelings to pick me up the next time I am feeling down and unsure of the whole process.